LONDON EATING
Rachael Stirling reviews Sumosan


My new boyfriend has just moved into my house. It is was nightmare. All his things arc mixed up with my things. I am having to learn How to sh-sh-sh (viviiig this word nukes me stutter) ...SHARE. Aarghhh! I don t like it.
Not wогк: bit. Yet tlut is cxactlv what arc encouraged to do at Sumosan - shire one another's plates. Jcc*. It is lud enough sharing cuplxurd space. Also compromise is another one I stutter over - I'm an only child, you sec. Bill I digress.
We arrived early enough to visit Sumovans J-bar. which its website boasted as having a sleek minimal design' and an intimate fed.' I ordered a suitably tarty pink Jasmine- tinithingy. Ibe Boy had something suitably butch. ' I he air-conditioning was bust» so suffocation was also on the menu - either that or twine flu. Sadly the music system was not broken, and we were serenaded by some casy-listcning-eastcrn-tcchno- dross that reminded me of the stuff they pipe into an airplanc as you arc boarding a long-distance (light to an exotic location. Birds and beats and stuff. Really. really annoying. With deep breaths we moved onwards ami upwards to the restaurant itself. It is a love poem to mushroom and mauve, two shades that which sound like they should go together. Sound like, mind - not look like. Who the hell designs a restaurant in mushroom and mauve? 1 wouldn't war them on a sock.
We ordered and sh... sh... sh...arcd a lobster salad that was presented in the perfect likeness of a green afro on a plate. 'Ihe lettuce was perfectly reconstructed in a ball and we had to root around for tlie fish beneath. It was tasty enough, lite tuna and truffle dish was an error, however - cross-continental fertilisation of delicacies proving the theory that one can have too
much of a good tiling. Startling as soloists, these ingredkntsareout of tunc in a duet.
The menu was all vaguely familiar. I forced myself to muster some enthusiasm, just as one might at a dreaded school reunion: 'Hello again' to black cod and miso, 'I low you been, salmon salad?' and Oooh, what a surprise» cdanumc with chilli!' 'Ihe Boy went off-piste with turbot on a bed of cauliflower and broccoli risotto. Under the fish was a pile of what looked like baby food. It was mushv and weird and
I returned gladly to my perfectly good grilled sea-bass.
"Ibis was undoubtedly chcapcr than Nobu. and on the whole the food was firve. But I was bored. Ihe place had no soul» no blood of its own. It played safe. Ivc seen it all l>cforc. done wit h rather more energy and joy. I know I'm being ruthless, but when it comes to restaurants. I will share if I have to. but I refuse to c.. .c.. .c.. .comprom be.

Next >